Help with domestic abuse at Christmas

It is that time of year again when lots of friends and family come together because it is expected and Christmas is portrayed to be the season of peace, love and happiness! Unfortunately, this idyllic vision of Christmas does not happen in all households.

Christmas, and the run up to it, can be an especially testing time in relationships where there is abusive behaviour or the relationship is falling apart.  Christmas magnifies these difficulties and provides a potential flashpoint for those difficulties to erupt.  If you are in that situation, it is important for you to know that there is help out there.

It is very important to remember that domestic violence is a criminal offence.  No one has the right to physically assault or abuse you or threaten to do so.  Should you be physically abused or threatened in this way, you should dial 999 and ask for the Police. 

Domestic abuse can also be a criminal offence, even if it does not result in actual violence against you.  Certain behaviours such as controlling or coercive behaviour can be deemed to be a criminal offence which the Police may well investigate.  All Police Forces have specialised domestic abuse Officers who will be able to help in those circumstances. If in doubt, call them.

If a relationship within the home becomes intolerable and you can, move yourself to a place of safety irrespective of whether or not you make a report to the Police.  Remember that children can be significantly impacted by domestic abuse and violence, even if it is not directed towards them.  If you have children, then they should be removed to an environment where there is no abusive behaviour.

If you believe that you are a victim of domestic abuse, always keep your mobile phone with you when you are around your abusive partner.  Where possible, try not to allow the abuser to physically come between you and the door out of the room that you are in.  Always try and position yourself near the exit, if you can.  If your personal safety is at risk, do not hesitate to call the Police. 

There are links placed below to various organisations that deal with domestic abuse issues.  Please engage with one of the organisations.  Quite apart from the practical advice and assistance they can give to you, together with counselling, they can help with the transition from being a domestic abuse victim to a domestic abuse survivor.  Please remember that abusive behaviour, whether at home or in the wider environment is not acceptable and it is not something that you must endure.

Lastly, seek legal advice from a fully qualified, experienced Solicitor such as those within our Family Team here at Harrowells.  There are civil orders that can be obtained (often called Occupation Orders and Injunctions) to assist in your personal protection both at home and whilst you are in the wider environment.

Wishing you all the very best for a safe festive season.

Domestic abuse - Supporting adults

Domestic abuse – City of York Council

IDAS

Domestic Abuse Helpline for Men Men's Advice Line UK

ManKind Initiative - Supporting Male Victims of Domestic Abuse

Homepage - National Domestic Abuse Helpline

Support for men - Refuge

What is domestic abuse? - Women’s Aid